One of the most common perceptions among people who support women’s right to end their pregnancies is that those who oppose abortion do so because they hate women and want to cause suffering, not because the welfare of humanity matters to them. I understand how so many came to this conclusion, given the tyranny that abortion restrictions impose. But is this belief accurate? And more importantly, what is it costing us?
Traditionally, opposition to abortion has come from political conservatives, who are known for pushing a social order of legal de-legitimization of same-sex romantic partnerships, stigma against extramarital sexual activity, and a cultural belief that having children–particularly for women–is both a universal desire and a civic obligation, all sugarcoated in the wholesome-sounding term “family values," as well as opposition of economic liberalism such as universal healthcare. Up to this point, the anti-choice ideology’s association with this dogma has made it easy to dismiss objections to abortion by pegging anyone raising them as a reactionary who only wants to legislate women's reproduction within a rigid familial structure, without promoting quality of life for humans after they have come into the world. And it certainly is true that this mentality persists into the modern anti-abortion movement: Planned Parenthood director turned forced-birth activist Abby Johnson reportedly said single mothers receiving assistance should be "cut off" after six months; the organization Students for Life is not only anti-abortion, but advocates against all forms of contraception other than "natural family planning" (NFP), whose failure rate is up to 23%.
But lately a movement calling itself “progressive pro-life” has arisen in response to the perception of motives of control, claiming to advocate for policies that protect humans after birth even as it works against abortion. The organization Rehumanize International addresses a number of other topics, among them the death penalty and police-inflicted brutality. Democrats for Life directly appeal to political liberals to support the anti-abortion ideology while maintaining their other liberal stances, by arguing that all are necessary for a “consistent life ethic.” Other social conservatism such as homophobia or women’s subordination to men does not appear to be in these groups' agenda.
Hypothetically, imagine that all those against abortion were were like such ostensibly liberal activists. Imagine if poverty were to become a thing of the past; if mothers were able to lavish in-person attention on their children and especially newborns without sacrificing their education or careers; if all capital punishment were replaced by rehabilitation of the incarcerated; if quality healthcare were universally affordable. Essentially, imagine that every pregnant woman could give birth knowing her child would grow up healthy, safe, well cared-for, and able to look forward to a bright future. In this world, what justification would there be for abortion? Responding to forced-birth advocates’ claims by accusing them of being motivated by authoritarianism fails to address the argument that abortion wrongfully takes a human being’s life, even makes pro-choice advocates seem not to have an adequate counter.
It is absolutely crucial to maintaining and advancing abortion rights to answer this question with reasoning based on universal human dignity and value that is just as compelling as anti-choice rhetoric about children’s lives. Dodges and easy answers may be convenient, but they create a perfect opportunity for forced-birth advocates who are otherwise progressive to counter with an appealing, but superficial–at least regarding abortion–message of caring, leaving women and girls unsure of which path is best for them doubly vulnerable to being steered down a potentially wrong one.
Whether an individual, organization, or political party is "truly pro-life" by advocating liberal or leftist policies is irrelevant to abortion. It is a red herring that inappropriately distracts from women's human rights; it must be emphasized that forcing someone to bear a pregnancy is a violation of those inherent rights, no matter what else the perpetrators do or do not support.
As inhumane as it is to compel someone to carry a pregnancy and give birth against her will, it’s easy to see why the ideology is so popular. More than any other human beings, children tend to receive the most sympathy if they die or suffer. Harming a child in particular is considered one of the worst violent crimes--for example, consider the general public reaction to a toddler's brutal murder or sexual abuse. Pregnancy is viewed with awe, while information about its risks is downplayed even by obstetricians and gynecologists, often called “complications” instead, like a vehicle malfunction—something usually easily fixed, not causing a long-term change to one’s life. And when even those supposed to be leading the movement for reproductive autonomy cannot come up with a more powerful response than vague phrases about “women’s choices” or “women’s bodies,” how much can abortion opponents be blamed for their ignorance?
Accusing them of having sadistic motivations blinds us to their humanity: to their personal experiences and fallibility that influence their perceptions; to why they might truly believe they are doing the right thing. With this way of thinking, how can we understand their beliefs about abortion, and answer in a way that makes sense to them? Indeed, if we believe there is so little possibility to change their minds, what is the incentive to try to help them?
Personal experience has informed my position on this topic. Neither shouting at abortion opponents nor assuming their views on sexuality or gender–as I had done when first involved in activism–was ever visibly productive. And still, I am not perfect by any means. But if I accept instead that they believe what they say they believe–e.g., that abortion is equivalent to murder, or that giving birth is just another responsibility that comes with motherhood–and logically break it down, showing why it is incorrect, a lack of hostility or admitted change in perspective is far more likely. Every person alienated by claims that she or he is hateful is a lost opportunity to change a mind and gain a pro-choice ally.
Don't underestimate the need to create a cultural shift to full support of reproductive autonomy from both sexes. A man who understands the gravity of the need for accessible care and affirms women's right to make their own, informed decisions will support the women around him against those who (maliciously or otherwise) seek to harm them. Such a man will raise his daughters to know their rights, and his sons to respect those rights. He will acknowledge his mother is not a vessel to which he was ever entitled. In his sexual relationships, rather than dehumanizing a person he impregnated while claiming to "protect her from abortion," he will recognize that she is as capable of autonomous decisions as when she allowed him access to her body, and take responsibility for the pregnancy he caused by facilitating the choice she makes.
The simplistic insistence that anti-abortion activists are "men who want to control women's bodies" ignores the thoughts and emotions of women themselves. A 2021 poll of Americans’ beliefs on abortion countered the common perception that pro-forced birth activists are a class of men wielding their power over resistant women: Forty-three percent of female respondents reported that they were “pro-life”. That number represents millions of women in the United States who believe their bodies are vessels others have a right to use, wanted or not; that their suffering is an obligation and an acceptable price to pay for the pregnancy that needs to use them; that unlike men, they can be used by force for their internal organs and their genitalia; their right to defend themselves from harm is merely a privilege dependent on not being pregnant.
Every one of them deserves to know her worth. She deserves relationships and friendships with men who recognize her humanity. She deserves to live in a world that affirms her rights in law and her dignity in its social values. As we brace for an uncertain future, it is the responsibility of us all to proactively, collectively create this reality.
Hi. I’m Mel. I go by the Twitter handle: @nopimping
This is me commenting as a guest.